This is one of the best essays about rape I've ever read, and it certainly backs up some significant decisions I've made about raising Wolfling to be fierce rather than accommodating when her boundaries are violated.
I have a number of women friends who have been raped, all of them by "friends," acquaintances, or a family member. And all the ones who have been willing to talk about it have expressed their feelings of helplessness and inhibition about fighting back, especially if it might "cause a scene."
Thanks to the friend who shared this in a locked post.
None of this is to deny that men also get raped, and the essasy does also address the social conditioning of men to be aggressive, but the author's focus in this particular piece is about women's social conditioning.