Some packing has been done, so there are boxes starting to build up, but the essentials are still where they've always been. There's excitement and some stress about the change and the work ahead, a bit of sadness about the loss of the place I've called home.
I'm tired, and not looking forward to the effort of the next couple of days, and am grateful for the friends and family who will be helping.
It was only after I'd posted that declaration yesterday that I started to understand its power.
My former MyCo colleagues and my family are thinking of me as "unemployed."
I am thinking of myself as "self employed." There is such a profound difference in the implications of those two labels.
If I were "unemployed" the power to shape my future would lie very much in the hands of the companies I applied to. I'd have some responsibility, of course, but ultimately it would be the company/hiring manager which decided whether or not I would have a job again.
"Self employed" puts the power and responsibility entirely in my own hands. Yes, I need to find more clients who want to do business with me, but no one person or organization will hold the lion's share of the power over my destiny. That lies squarely with me.
"Unemployed" means that I don't have a job.
"Self Employed" means that I do have a job and that I have the responsibility to work at it consistently.
I could have sworn I'd moved everything in the bottom of my closet, but I just found it after almost emptying the entire thing. I'd taken out a box, and when I came back in it was lying there in plain sight.
I had a meeting today with a counselor at the "transition management" company which MyCo retained to help us find new jobs. Not only do they do traditional job search stuff like networking, resume building, negotiation and etc., they also do advising on entrepreneurial ventures.
The guy I spoke to today already knew what spiritual direction is, which was a plus, and he got very excited about the specific plans for my practice as well as my already-developed ideas for marketing. He said that he definitely thinks there's a market for me.
The next step is for me to write a business plan and get back to see him to review it. I've given myself a two-week deadline.
I can't tell you how encouraging it was to have a total stranger become so engaged and enthusiastic about my plans and ideas -- and he assured me that he usually has a lot more questions about the viability of peoples' plans. He thinks I have a clear vision, a good understanding of business, and good ideas.
And it's sunny out.
And we get to have Mom's pot roast for dinner tonight.